


Aftermath

by keitolino



Series: The Shiritoris [1]
Category: Dir en grey
Genre: Angst, POV First Person, Suicide
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-10-05
Updated: 2014-10-05
Packaged: 2018-02-19 23:40:36
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 737
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2407166
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/keitolino/pseuds/keitolino
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Kyo visits his best friend, Daisuke.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Aftermath

**Author's Note:**

> I joned the shiritori-lj-comm, and this is my first participation work in it! sheryl ended her story with "I guess this will be my duty for the time being.”, so here I start with **"being"**.
> 
> plus, [inspiration](http://www.dailymotion.com/video/x192rk9_full-pv-sukekiyo-aftermath_music) ♥
> 
> **Do not repost.**

Being close to you is necessary for me to breathe. Our relationship is therapeutical for each of us; a give and take of comfort and consolation. Also scolding; but only when it is needed.

We wouldn't see each other for a while if one of our bands was on tour; but even so often afterwards. Sometimes I would stand in the back rows of your concerts when I was in town, and sometimes you would do the same. Just like that, we give courage to each other. Courage to continue, courage to breathe.

Just yesterday, we exchanged mails. You explained difficulties with releasing your new album, and I was giving you consolation. “It's going to be fine”, I texted you. But we couldn't meet up; and that's why I am here today. 

As I step into your apartment, I put off my shoes in the tiny space between the door and the hallway. I look around – and that only to see almost complete darkness. Something differs from the usual.

From outside the windows, I see a dim light falling onto the floor of your living room. I can see cockroaches hiding from the light. The whole ground is filled with old news papers, maybe they're new ones, but they're dirty. In fact it doesn't matter if they're new or old – they're crumbled, torn apart.

No one would read them anymore.

I let the keys fall on the wardrobe, which is overflowing with flyers of fast-food delivery services. Your apartment always had this usual scent – your personal scent, mixed with cologne and smoke. 

This time, I smell nothing. My senses are blinded; numb. I can't feel the crumbled newspapers under my feet, I only can hear the noise they make when I push them aside. Nevertheless my legs lead me into your bedroom.

It's empty. 

As my eyes gaze through the darkness, the only thing I make out is a lot of tissues all over your bed. Alcoholic leftovers everywhere I look; and on your nightstand are the usual packages of medication – sedatives. 

But the room is still empty. Where are you?

I continue forcing my way through the messy apartment, as I reach the bathroom. I sneak a peek inside it; but I see nothing I am looking for. The tub is partly filled with water; the shower-head is dripping. 

Please show up, Daisuke.

Closing my eyes, I take a deep breath in. I try to concentrate on an even so tiny scent; but I can't sense anything. My hands are shaking; and it feels like time is slipping through my fingers. With each step I take through your apartment, my heart starts racing more and more.

I know that every step I take leads me closer to you. My palms are sweaty and I can feel the ground shaking. Trying my best to stay calm, but I call out your name. “Daisuke” – my voice echoes and loses itself in the darkness around me.

Can you hear me, Daisuke?

Cockroaches are fleeing from my feet as I invade their space by stomping through your hallway. Quickly; to escape death they are crawling under the skirting board. How lucky they are.

As I reach the living room; cold air hits my face. My lungs stop providing me with air; it feels as if a chain tightens itself around them. I want to scream, but I can't. My voice is stuck in my throat – it's not able to crawl over my lips.

I wish I would wake up from this nightmare, but I can't. Because it's real. It's you – it's Daisuke. I have found you.

Countless shivers are running down my spine; cold, colder than the air in here. They leave me in shudder; in utmost despair and shock. With all the strength I have left, I manage to place one foot in front of the other, until I reach you.

Red strings, gracefully contouring your neck. 

I close my eyes – and as I stretch out my arm to touch you, I collapse on the floor, onto the crumbled newspapers; pressing my hands on my ears to silence the world around me.

Voices screaming at me from all around; screaming at me for not coming sooner. For not noticing what you were going through. I don't dare to look up again, I just shake my head and cry out loud. 

“Why didn't you call me–“, I hear myself whimper.


End file.
